Lately, I have been questioning my doings and whether or not it was worth all the effort. As much as I wanted to crawl under the bed and just have life happen however it should, I will honestly say that I could not have that happen. Not the “life happening the way it should” part, but the crawling under the bed because… clearly I ain’t small enough! PSSHHHhhhhhh. LOL.

Shjoe, okay!

clearly I ain't
Photographed by KayJay Photography

I just had to do that because sometimes, we (me included) take life waaaaay too serious and forget that GOD is the author of our lives (Hebrews 12:2) and only he can control things and has great plans for us. Plans to prosper us not to harm us (Jeremiah 29:11)! So, why are we stressing!

“Clearly I ain’t”…

…followed by a few other words, is a statement we all tell ourselves when:

  • we don’t book the job we want
  • we don’t get married within the time we planned
  • we don’t get filled-in on important matters
  • we are alienated/isolated from the “rest”
  • we are different

It may not seem good at the time but God has something else in mind for you.

clearly I ain't

Being bold, fearless and embracing differences was something I had to learn to achieve and become! I was not any of those things in my very young years of existence. It takes work and effort to be all that you are, but it starts with ACCEPTING all that you are first.

Do you know what you are capable of?

Do you know what you are called to do?

Do you know what sets you apart?

Just a few weeks ago, I found myself anxious about life again. Questioning EVERY little thing. Wanting to CONFORM but for WHAT ? Being who I am just didn’t seem okay because my heart does not beat for the things of this world and I have no desire in participating in things that have ZERO AUTHENTICITY. Not wanting what everyone else wants made me feel like my authenticity means nothing! And in believing that lie, I stayed in a dark space in my mind without anyone knowing… Chester (my husband), picked up on it without really knowing what was going on, but I kept him out of it because I didn’t know how to communicate it to him.

Meet Chester Langenhoven. We are two very different people but he is everything I need and more. Most times I feel junk for him, because dealing with me is one thing but living with me… eish, LOL.

P.s – he was the special guest I mentioned on instagram.

clearly I ain't


Chester is wearing:

Bomber – AidanJ

Blue polka dot shirt – Mr Price

Blue chino – Identity

Hat – His late grandpa’s hat

Belt – Markham

I am wearing:

Bomber – AidanJ 

Cream polar-neck and cream pants – No idea. These items were given to me 🙂

Shoes – Mr Price

clearly I ain't

We are often alienating ourselves because we have forgotten that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). And no weapon formed against us shall prosper (Isaiah 54:17), should we just TRUST God with everything and have faith (Galatians 3:9)!

Let your thoughts of yourself be good and honourable to your parents and God. Acknowledge the “dip” (low self-esteem, negativity and self-doubt) and choose to be grateful instead, because your latter will be greater.

“Clearly I ain’t” a carbon copy, but unique!

clearly I ain't

Hope you were blessed by this.

Happy Styling!